Dreams Do Come True

DREAMS DO COME TRUE

 

 

 

I have many dreams; dreams of starting an Orphanage, dreams of being a motivational speaker, author, a home owner with land, a dream of filling my home with sons, and many more. All these dreams like most dreamers are good.

 

I grew up in a home where everyday was a struggle for survival. You just never new if when you woke up we'd have lights, or if the phone would work, or how we were going to eat. Everyday I remember as a struggle. As a little girl I never believed my dreams would come true. It's not that I didn't dream but, that the dreams that I had I believed were (just dreams). I minimized them because it was easier than to just be disappointed.

 

Tonight my husband took me to a production Cinderella at the theater. The fairy god mother said several amazing things that just shook me to the core. She said "Once you have a dream you'll know it's yours because you'll have to fight for it".

 

For as long as I've been married my husband has wanted to own a home. But, I have not shared the same passion. Yes, I want to own a home, but I never believed deep down inside dreams really come true. My mom became a home owner after my father became an inmate at Washington State Pen, but that would have never happened without the incomes of us kids. Even after she had her home it was so stressful just to live. With my life experiences nipping at my heart steeling pieces of my courage, I unknowingly settled for a life of a dreamer and decided thinking about them was luck enough.  

 

As I watched this amazing production my heart filled with hope and a sting of regret. I haven't even tried, really tried to buy a home because I am terrified. I do not know any kind of life without deep and painful obstacles. And, though it's a dream of mine (ours),  my experience has scared my desire to push through and to fight for it. I've never known success, lived with it or have had the courage to risk. When I have risked it's been a few dollars here and there while trying to decide how this money that I was spending was going to cost me later. I definitely never imagined that God would fulfill all my dreams. This is huge for me. I felt lucky just to think that maybe I could do this, be that, but never thought that I could do that.... and be that... at the same time.

 

After leaving the play I looked at my husband and I apologized. Because I have made him dreaming to own a home and fighting for that dream so difficult. In my own pursuit of dreams after experiencing the waging war I decide as if it's second nature to stop dreaming that dream, because the cost just seems to great for the reward. I try to suffocate my hearts great desire.

 

Not much different than the cowardly lion.....

My husband so patient and full of hope for the future has been thrashing it out with a wife who's hope for the future has been solely waiting on Jesus. Such a bleak, joyless marriage he's been in.

 

After sharing with my husband my fears, of not being able to afford a home, build an orphanage, become that motivational speaker, he looked at me and said, "I know your afraid, but taste and see that HE is good."

 

My trembling hasn't left but, I have a renewed hope for the future probably for the first time in years. I have tasted; HE is good, and I know that HE has put our dreams in our heart. So we look forward to the years to come with anticipation and hope for tomorrow. And, as we prepare to be pre-qualified I will trust in the Goodness of God to make a way, His way.