A Pharisee To
Guilty by omission. Thats right I am a pharisee to. Although if you'd ask me just six months ago I would have been highly offended. This is what has made me realize that just how I fell into the pharisee trap.
God in his mighty strength snatched me from a pit of death, planted me on sold free ground cleaned me off and began to heal me. I fell in love and my zeal for Him grew and grew. I was getting to know Jesus and his heart for me. After a while I realized that the crowd of believers that was experiancing this same zeal was smaller then the crowd that wasn't. I began to ask why they were not excited like me. How could they not. I mean did they not fall in love too.
Then as God was willing to work with this mess called me. I began to understand and become skilled in the way of ministry. I then realized that not all leaders had zeal either and my heart started to form opinions and draw conclusions and I studied people and their walk with God. I became fearful that I would loose my zeal and therefore I became diligent in my seeking of God. The more I saught God the more I let others know that if they wanted a closer relationship with God they to must seek him, because it was working for me.
My heart is good and I have to say that I had no idea that I was a pharisee in training. Isn't this how satan works though. You are filled with zeal for the Lord and then satan takes your gaze away from God for a split second and you realize that what you are seeing and hearing how others experiance Christ is a far cry from what you experiance. It is a deadly trap an addictive one.
Countless times I have asked why are they leading they don't even get it, or this is a sad time the church is a mess. In my heart I have said much more. I pray that I am not the lone pharisee.
Yet this problem begs for a deeper answer. How do you loose the joy of your salvation? How do we as leaders encourage others to lay hold of their zeal for God with out coming across as having it figuared out? How do you walk in humility, grace and understanding sometimes for years with one person or several while being passionate, determined, feirce, and bold? Those seem so opposite of eachother. I am incapeable of not sinning.
