Becoming New

Becoming New

The road to freedom bends and winds around treacherous terrain of the heart. Jagged formations of former loves, former camps of desires have taken on a new look and thus we are destined to journey through them. The path although narrow in its beginning it cluttered with those who have settled for the less true ideal God.  Unwilling to give up what they feel they must keep to live in the journey. They have become fixtures and thus the way requires so much perseverance from the head of our trail. Breaking free for the grips of scoffers and the pull from the enemy is celebration in it own victory and there is a time and season of rejoicing. Yet, like all things we must for the sake of flight walk the road of redemtion. The winds began to change and you suddenly feel naked with out your sin. The icy winds of your broken heart dance across your shoulders and you shiver into the brisk wind on your heart. You look up and see the storm rising in the distance and thoughts began to arise as you grip the grave cloths. The higher you climb there are less campers, yet the road is littered with false imitations of life. Your shoes tell the story of the grave and your appearance ragged torn and week. In the depth of your sorrow your cry out where is this rejoicing where is this life God have you forsaken me? Then with out a moments streams of light break through the clouds and shatter the damp chill that sent our hearts reeling in a spiral of searing loneliness. The warmth of God dances across your back like a warm embrace from a familiar friend. Only to catch yourself and pull away. So the love of God quakes with grief and he sends companions. Those that know the way, those that know the heart of God. 

It is one step in front of another as you began to tell your story of freedom. There is a likeness in redemption and you began to understand. You turn a corner in your path before you and to continue your shoes must come off. It is there that you must chose again. Will you continue or will you keep your shoes and turn back. You began to ask will not my feet crack and bleed? The terrain is jagged and the cliffs are sharp. In a whisper almost so quiet yet familiar not to your ears but to your soul says " Will you trust me"? For the removal defies all understanding, and the logic begs to instead relinquish my hat. It is in my heart to continue with my shoes so in my udder desperation for freedom and redemption and lay my hat down and reach to climb this peak. My feet grind down the lose gravel and my flesh tears and I fall. There my companion whispers to my heap of me. It is in the letting go that you climb. Then again the small quiet voice only familiar to my soul whispers, "will you trust me". God I exclaim who am I without my sin? In your weakness I am strong, I will never leave you nor forsake you. I removed my shoes to see the broken flesh beneath and my heart sobbed. I had no idea the condition my feet were in. My companion gathered my arm and walked with me over what seemed impassable before. There on the other side was a small pool of water. There I lay week and this companion washed my broken feet. The healing water was relief to the aching soul and I lay my head on the path. There in the arms of the angles my soul was refreshed for the journey ahead. It was then that I danced by the pool of healing water for my feet were healed and clean. 

Gathering my things I made my way up the narrow path with my companion at my side. There we rejoiced in the healing I'd received. This day God was glorified. A breeze danced by and the carried with it the smell of rain. In worry I exclaimed for this way we take is far to narrow to travel wet. Frantically I searched for shelter but none could be found. The clouds began to roll in and we were bound to get wet. Fear turned out ward and my companion took the heat. My anger raged at my circumstances and I questioned where God was. The rain began to fall and beat on my face and I coughed at the hat I had discarded just a few days before. My eyes stung and there was no choice to close them. Lets stay I begged yet my companion exclaimed this is not the place, hold my hand and let God lead the way. With my eyes closed to there pain I followed his lead. The rain lifted and my eyes opened and there my eyes had changed. What once was hard in my gaze it was softness that replaced. Looking at my feet it was clear for me to see the prints of those who have walked this path before me and I was curtain that I was in company. My eyes lifted from the ground and met with my companion and there hope filled my face. 

The path seemed softer and my feet welcomed the relief and I thanked God for the widening of the path. It was in the voice of my companion that cautioned me to stay close. For the way is narrow and less traveled. The ground was wet from the earlier rain and the sky burned hot. As I walked the mud dried on my legs and garments and it became stiff heavy. Higher and higher we climbed and sweat dripped from my brow as I struggled to carry this weight. The more I sweat the dust from the path clung to my garments and the load became heavier and heavier. Day after day I walked, then my companion let me know that there would be many long days ahead yet the journey although hard would be worth every bit. Out of breath from my burden I replied "I hope so". My souls began to become painful and I moved slower and slower frequently asking to rest along the way. The bottom half of my cloths were weighed down by what seemed more like rocks and my knees began to buckle. My companion noticed and said " You don't need to carry this, you may want to let it go". What I thought and be naked? The way is steep and it is easier if you let it all go. Well, in my complete shock that God would want me to give up my cloths I let my bags go and it freed my hands to balance. It seemed easier, but my legs could not bare it any more and with tears streaking down my face I herd his voice again saying, "Let if go for I am strong in your weakness". But, God I let my bags go. Thank you for that he replied by I am after so much more then that. What else do you want? Nothing that I have is worth it now. I am after your heart He said. My heart I said why. It is littered all over the valley. I have no heart. Oh you do I gave you a new heart and this heart although has been hurt good. In utter disbelief of I gathered my rock rags for cloth and stood to my wobbly legs and tarried on. Remember said my companion the journey is hard and the way is narrow. I must out of my own determination reach the top of this mountain for I have come to far to go back. Crawling on my knees the jagged rocks and filth cut deep and I cried in pain. Shrinking under the weight of my way I let my garments go. There I lay in the heat of the evening day and saw my heart shattered. With perfect cuts and delicate hands His healing power began to piece me together one part at a time. I could not bare to see my shame again. There He spoke to me I love you, I made you, I came for you to set you free. There is no more shame and to day you are forever changed. I lay at his feet and my tears overwhelmed me as Jesus touched my heart and filled me with life. With His mighty hand he reached down and picked me up and there he stretched out my wings! He washed me in holy water and I was clean without stain. He took his robes and wrapped them around me and said with absolute brilliance displayed! You have captured my heart my beloved. Come with me beautiful!

Here you see the journey of faith displayed

The transformation that must take place 

Through my nakedness I was clothed

In my letting go I was filled 

And in my weakness I was strengthen

From my mourning He gave me Joy

Through I was shame now I am free and clean

Thank you Jesus for loving me